News Round Up

It has been a while since my last update partly due to technical issues, lack of time and lack of news. Today I bring you a comprehensive update of…well everything.

Congrats to [ECC] Bloodloss for becoming a full member of the clan. For those who missed it you can catch his player profile in the news archives. [ECC]R Weetabixx has also joined up as a recruit with his poll due tomorrow. I feel a player profile piece coming on soon…

 Inter-clan scrims will be continuing with 2142 coming up on the 9^th March and of course the POE mod night this Sunday. Once these are out of the way we will be planning a vanilla BF2 scrim as the first proved so popular and fun. Please remember to check and sign up on VWARS for all clan events even if you are not attending please leave a response.

 Later this year sees the release of Battlefield Heroes . The game is full of promise with the emphasis on fun and a level playing field whilst retaining all of the Dice and EA production values. So expected to be desk topped as you are lining up that headshot, random disconnects, furious lag spikes and regular patches to ruin the original game play. Check the trailer out here. Discuss here...clicky.

Fresh Meat For The Grinder – By Millwalker

In a slightly belated update we would like to welcome [ECC] Jakthrice to the clan after a successful recruitment period.

We also welcome [ECC]R Bloodloss as our latest recruit to the clan. As per the norm it is only fair to break the ice and introduce Bloodclot formally to the you all.

Clotty is a graduate from the online school of AmericanAccent.com where he passed with distinction. On graduation he was offered a job in the elite training school, known as “Top Gun” and became an instructor much like Maverick did in the popular film of the same name.

Scary as his avatar is Clotty is not actually a real vampire and is not in fact undead. Despite this I do urge caution and remind you all not to invite him into your home and to prepare garlic and holy water just in case he gets ‘hungry’ in your company.

Born in Oslo, Norway Clotty can stand shoulder to shoulder with some of the true greats his country has produced. Popular children’s novelist and [ECC]DirtyKiller’s favorite author Roald Dahl (have you finished George’s marvelous medicine yet Dirty? Crusty wants it back so he can give it another shot), Ernest Lawrence whose significant contributions helped create the atomic bomb and Abba to name but a few.

Later in life Clotty moved to Leeds and this produces a different list of greats such as John Craven , Elizabeth Dawn and errr… my mate Sam is from Leeds as well.

Welcome to the clan mate, so climb aboard the good ship [ECC] pwnage and get ready to set sail for Hoeland.

Back in 96’ was the last time I worked for the Council. Back then I was assigned to scraping the scum off the smelly end of bin lorries with my finger nails. Now I have moved up in the world, well sideways anyway and have a position on the [ECC] Council. I may be a mere deputy at the moment but believe me plans are already speeding along for world domination.

Oh yes things are going to change around here and to start off with I’m going to focus on the scum ridden, pornographic and frankly offensive hovel that is the [ECC] forums.

RULES are RULES and they are being broken every minute of every day and I for one say “enough is enough”. It’s time to take a stand, name and shame and clean up. Before continuing you may want to familiarise yourself with the forum rules sticky found in the forum members sticky. As per usual my article is illustrated via the magic that is hyperlink...

Rule Breaker 1 – Nitro for this post

This breaks rule number 1 as it is clearly discrimination. As you know Mattttttttt likes them much larger than this and therefore the post discriminates against the more dumpster-esque style strippers Matttt knows and loves.

Verdict: – Guilty, Sentence: – Grounded for a month and subscription to the Beano suspended.

Rule Breaker 2 – Deadeazi for this post

This breaks rule number 9 as the post is clearly in the wrong forum category. Stating “I’m not into this shite but you guys might be” does not absolve your liability either. We currently do not have any female or any under-14 members hence why don’t have a birds or junior section in the forum.  Come on Eazi, man up you big Jessie.

Verdict – Guilty, Sentence: - Sexuality readjustment. 48 hours in a locked room with 2 cases of wicked strength lager, 2 bottles of JD, 4 large bottles of White Lightening, 80 woodbines and 24/7 footy and porn (straight).

Rule Breaker 3 – Crusty for this post

This is a violation of Rule 10, impersonating a clan member. Crusty has clearly compromised my account and tried to discredit me by insinuating that I enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage. Everyone knows I’m T’total.

Verdict – Gulity, Sentence:- No turtle porn for a month and Net Nanny installed on to all PCs in the household.

 plea bargains, confessions and general comments here please:- clicky

Player Profile [ECC] DK: 1965 by Millwalker

 In a continuation of our new regular exciting feature (it still really is) we are going to plunge into the leg end that is [ECC] DK:1965 

 DK is related to the famous Harry Potter author JK Rowling. In fact JK, in homage to DK, modeled the character of the Aragog the gargantuan spider on DK. This may go someway to explain why the two are no longer on speaking terms.

 Believe it or not (and why wouldn’t you believe it?) it’s not the first time DK has flirted with the stardom. In his younger days DK stared as an extra in Coronation Street during the portrayal of the poll tax riots in Manchester. If you look carefully you can see DK chasing someone down with his samurai sword.      

 Question Time with DK 

Favorite Movie?

Confessions of a window cleaner

 What’s playing on your i-pod?

Shakin' Stevens

First Job?

Hand, but gloved 

Favorite Quote?

"I can resist everything except temptation." - Oscar Wilde

TV?

Only on Friday.

 Bad Habit?

Chewing Teabags 

Dream Holiday?

Mexico

comments?